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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 0:31:29 GMT -5
I shook my head. "You didn't do anything. I was pushing myself onto you because I was jealous... I probably only liked you at first because Sorina liked you... I probably thought that getting you to like me would keep you from hurting her... Eventually I found we had similarities though and so I became obsessed. I've never had such a strong feeling toward a guy and I don't understand why I acted that way. I'm completely ashamed of myself. Why don't you hate me?!" I cried.
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 8:48:22 GMT -5
I shook my head. "Okay, first of all, I'll at least back up Sunny on that she genuinely hated me when we first met. Second of all, I can't hate you because you've rendered me incapable of the emotion - at least towards you. You've changed me immeasurably, Princess. In no way is that a bad thing."
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 12:43:24 GMT -5
"I knew that she liked you. Neither of you could see it but I could. The way she talked about you. Even though she said she couldn't stand you I knew for sure that she loved you. There was no changing that. I just had wished it was me. My jealousy over took everything and still to this day I haven't been able to get over you. Even though I try to tell myself that there's no way it could happen my heart won't let me give up." I said softly as the amount of tears lowered. I had my head lowered to keep from looking in his eyes. "I think it's even more stubborn than I am..." I giggled softly. Then I bit my lip and shook my head. I cried harder and sobbed into my hands again. I hated myself so much...
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 13:58:23 GMT -5
I sighed and hugged her gently, finding myself at a complete loss for words.
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 14:26:29 GMT -5
"I'm really sorry... I hate that I'm like this... I shouldn't make you feel bad... You love someone and it's not fair that I try to make you love me instead. I'm really so sorry..." I cried harder. "I hate myself..." I cried softly.
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 14:28:08 GMT -5
"Don't be sorry, Princess. Don't hate yourself, either. This isn't your fault, okay?" I said softly.
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 19:13:03 GMT -5
"Yes it is. I could've chosen to accept the fact that you love Sorina and she loves you. Instead I keep pushing myself on you and trying to make you love me. I only think of myself. I'm so selfish!" I cried even harder into my hands.
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 19:15:38 GMT -5
"Crystal, surely you know that you're the least selfish person on this planet," I said softly.
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 20:36:02 GMT -5
"No I'm not. I don't believe that at all..." I said softly as I continued to cry.
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 21:04:14 GMT -5
I shook my head. "Selfish people don't try to sacrifice themselves for friends," I said matter-of-factly.
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 21:51:28 GMT -5
"I really wish I could believe that I'm not selfish but I can't admit to that..." I said softly as I cried.
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 21:55:53 GMT -5
"Crystal - " I was interrupted by a knock on the door. "Don't move, okay?" I said softly, going to open it. I wasn't surprised to see Sunny. "How is she?" she asked softly, stepping into the house. I stared at her seriously. "In pieces." She bit her lip, a habit familiar to me now; at least she wasn't accidentally splitting open her lip again. I sighed. "Come on."
{Sorina} "Crystal?" I called softly, stepping into her room.
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 22:24:47 GMT -5
I looked up. "Hey Sorina," I said softly. "I'm sorry I ran off like I did... I'm just really upset is all..." I said as I continued to cry.
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Post by Luna on Feb 13, 2011 22:26:40 GMT -5
"I can see that." I sat beside her and hugged her gently. "Want to tell me what's going on?"
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Post by jlcgurl on Feb 13, 2011 22:37:05 GMT -5
"I'm just really upset with myself..." I said softly. "I've never realized how terrible of a friend I've been to both of you when all you do is help me..." I said as I cried harder.
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